When The Mechanics Aren’t Enough
You Know the Routine
You meal prep.
You get your steps in.
You journal in the morning.
You even pause before eating to take a deep breath.
You're doing the "right things”, following all of the rules to a T, but something still feels off. And you’re told it’s your fault, that you must be doing something wrong or just aren’t trying hard enough. So, you let the shame and embarrassment lead you to an even more restrictive lifestyle. But still, nothing changes…
If this sounds like you and you're wondering why you can follow all the checklists perfectly, but still feel disconnected, I want to offer a different perspective!
You can read all the books, do all the mechanics, and still miss the point… If you're not present in the process.
I know it’s easy to fall into autopilot, promise. You get into the groove of building habits, and before long they become just another chore to check off your to-do list. And that’s where the disconnect sits, waiting for you to give up, because real transformation doesn’t come from crossing off boxes. A toddler can do that… So, you need something more, something deeper.
You need to learn how to be with yourself in the moments you're doing the thing.
Presence Over Perfection
So many of us are living for the outcome, waiting for the goals to be hit before we actually “enjoy life”. And it’s gotten to the point the we don’t want to be an active participant in the hard stuff anymore, because we just want to get to the end result already. But when this is all we focus on, we usually don’t make it to the final destination we’ve been pining for. Want to know why?
Presence helps you collect data. If you’re rushing through a walk while answering emails, you’re not noticing how your body feels or what it might be trying to tell you. And if your watching tv while eating, you can’t hear your fullness cues or check in with your satisfaction levels, often causing you to overeat.
Presence brings intention. When you prep meals while mentally beating yourself up for how you ate yesterday, it becomes about punishment for the past instead of nourishment for the present and future.
Presence builds connection. When you're disconnected from your body, it’s easy to misread signals or ignore needs. But when you tune in, you build trust and reduce the mental exhaustion that constantly pushed you into brain shut-down mode.
It’s time to start embracing right now, where it’s raw and new, because this is where you create the consistency and resilience that gets you to the end goal.
A Moment for Reflection
Get curious with yourself and allow your mind to invest in the present moment, not just the future. Ask yourself:
“Where in my life am I doing the "right" thing, but without truly showing up for it?”
Maybe it's with exercise and every movement or physical activity feels more like a chore than an opportunity to support your body. Or, maybe it’s with your eating habits where all of your food choices seem to be made from fear instead of self-trust. It could even be with your new journaling practice that reads more like a report card than a space to explore. Wherever it is, don’t judge it or yourself. Sometimes we don’t notice this kind of stuff until it’s pointed out to us. So, just use this as your reminder to come back to the here and now.
Consider This
Next time you go to do one of your wellness habits, pause for 10 seconds and consider the thought, feeling and purpose behind the action.
Why am I doing this?
What do I need right now?
How can I bring more presence to this moment?
You don’t need to do more. You need to be with yourself more. And even a tiny shift in awareness like this can turn a habit from mindless to meaningful. Remember, you’re building a relationship with your body, your needs, and your life. And that’s the kind of work that actually lasts. But if you have any questions or concerns, you can always email me at info.khhllc@gmail.com.
